Who you truly are is not revealed in times of ease and enjoyment, but rather when you are facing pain. Just as in a stress test, only under pressure do we see the true material of what we’re made of.

Most pain is self-inflicted, a consequence of our own choices. Whether a choice is right or wrong shouldn’t be judged by whether it leads to pain, but rather by whether it brings peace of mind.

However, some pain—especially profound suffering—often seems orchestrated by fate. We can’t live entirely according to our own desires, nor can we foresee how life will ultimately unfold. My father, in his final days, tried earnestly to control the way he departed. I also know some people choose euthanasia. Yet I believe that it’s difficult to escape the destiny that includes suffering and the trials meant for one’s life. Life inherently contains suffering, but it’s hard to understand its meaning while going through it. Only after enduring it do we begin to see its purpose.

We gain knowledge and wisdom as preparation for inevitable moments of suffering. Pain has the power to “complete” a life, and continually avoiding it only narrows the path forward. The more we focus on our own feelings, the more we want to escape pain; and the more we try to escape it, the more vulnerable we become.

Everyone’s suffering can become a part of their life’s uniqueness. Viewing life as a treasure hunt is a positive and proactive perspective. In this journey of exploration, what we should aim to avoid is not pain, but making decisions based on flawed models. Along the way, collecting even a few genuine treasures makes the journey worthwhile. Focus on avoiding foolishness (becoming wiser before major decisions) rather than on deliberately avoiding pain.

痛苦的意義在選擇之後

你是怎樣的一個人，不是由在順境中享受時的反應得知，而是在面對痛苦的時候才顯現出來的。就像壓力測試的時候，才知道受測物是什麼材料做的。

大部分的痛苦是自作自受，是自己選擇的結果，至於這個選擇是對是錯，不能由事後是否痛苦來判斷，而是由能否心安來決定。

但是有些痛苦(尤其是巨大的痛苦)，往往是命運的安排，我們不會完全照著自己希望的方式活著，也無法預料人生將如何終結。

我父親在最後的日子很努力想安排自己的死亡方式，我也知道有些人會替自己選擇安樂死。但我相信人很難擺脫命運的安排，尤其是那本就屬於你人生的苦難與磨練，人生本是苦，但是正在經歷苦難的時候很難發現它的意義。唯有經歷它之後才看得懂這個安排的目的。

人學習知識與智慧，就是在為每一刻的苦難作準備。因為痛苦有「圓滿」人生的作用，一昧的逃避它會讓人生之路越走越窄。越把注意力放在自己的感受上，就越想逃避痛苦，越想逃避痛苦，就越容易受到傷害。

每個人的痛苦都可以成為他人生獨特性的一部分。把人生視作一個尋寶之旅是很正面積極的，在這個探險與長征的過程，要努力避免的並不是痛苦，而是避免依據錯誤的模型做決定。一路上我們只需收集寥寥幾顆珍寶便不虛此行，把注意力放在避免愚蠢(讓自己在大決定之前變聰明)，而不是刻意排除痛苦。